The Vision of My Life

Showing posts with label jobless. Show all posts


Few Guys in Bangalore..

                                       
                                      In trendy Bangalore, I got to meet different kinds of guys which gave me funny experiences and this is the reason for me for blogging here.
                   I found most of the guys are really choosy and prefers that the girls should be trendy and posh to the update even though they are not remarkable with their looks or appearances. Once, I heard a comment from a guy, a nerd suggesting a girl for her matching ear rings, while he failed to match his tie for his own shirt..!!
                          " A pink designed Tie on a blue checks shirt !!  "   [ It's Irritating ! ]


                    They are very cooperative & jovial to such an extent that one could ask me for a bike ride on our first meet!!  [ Can't they think that it might hurt a girl ! ]  He likes to party the coincidence that we both were same, a 2008 passed out Andhra Engineering student from CSE back ground. [ Of course, a very good reason for an ice-cream party but not for a bike ride. ]  Also he promised me that he wont kidnap me for any reason. [ So kindly na? ] I denied him in a straight way [ I don't prefer! ] and hence he didn't spoke to me [ I never mind ] ever for the next time.
                    They are very caring about my relationships too. A guy was shock and felt very disappointed listening from me that I'm not dating any boy friend. [ Saaala! Over acting!! ] Also pleasing me with his tips to take care while choosing a boy friend. [ No thanks! Get lost U idiot !! ]
                    While the other guy, at a time started his conversation as if he knew me since ages. [ Without knowing at least my name.. ] convincing me to know my details, address and all. [ Areee chal Bakra! I'm smarter than you! ] I missed the pic of his face at that moment when I replied him, "I'm not the girl that you concerned about.. So please lemme Go!!" He simply shut his mouth and take his path away. [ Bechara! G'luck for the next time. ]
                     Some times I really don't understand why they underestimate the girls. One guy among such kind of people, asked me, "Hey! what can we say 'you are mesmerizing' or else 'you are awesome' in telugu? I really want to learn it" [ You fool! I'm not here to reply you.. ] I replied him, " Try to google it! you will get better answers for that." [ Try for the better option to impress me! ]  


I really hate this guy for his exclusive offers.
" What's your problem with me when I have an ATM card?? " [ Stupid! Not every girl likes your ATM. ]


" I'm on your way to my home. Lemme drop you. I don't have probs with the petrol charges! " [Oye duffer! I'm not such kind of a girl to follow you. I can pay for myself! ]


" Shall we go to a movie? Am I not your friend?? " [ I pity you for your deafness. You can never understand that I'm avoiding you!! ]






                            However, on the same heights, I found they are emotional and affectionate too. I got 3 best buddies. 
One cool friend, jovial and always smiling. [ Like Me!! ] Very cooperative and understanding either to discuss about the subject or to bunk the classes. Sharing and caring too. 


And two God's Gifted-brothers among which the elder one always tells me not to believe everyone and to be very careful in the city. He is very caring and always warns me with the hint that the people are doesn't actually as they seem. [ I really love his brotherhood.


Some of his famous dialogs that he always shares with me..


"Please ra, Do not believe everyone blindly! "


"Try to think in the other way! "


"You are talented. Why cant U start a firm by yourself?" 


"Why can't you put the fake experience and get a job?"


"Choose the nutritional food. Pizza, burger and Curd rice are just waste! "


"Do not roam alone in the roads. Go out only if you have any companion along with you. " 


"Don't eat too much of Ice-cream!!"  [ I hate this. ]


and many more.. 


The younger one, who always freak out and funny, collects all the necessary notes and softwares which really helps me a lot. We could have a great time together. Our frequency matches because of our telugu back ground and, he is the second and next to me among the Outstanding personalties in our class. [ ;) ]










* I didn't mentioned the names for my privacy.





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A strange Infosys Interview

Once while checking my mails for any job openings, I got a mail regarding an interview, that too it's in Infosys which dragged my attention to view the mail. It's the most funny and the ever-long lively mail that I felt strange and more over I want to keep it as a note.
Here it goes.

Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.

Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!

Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it ..
What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly! in 12th. I was getting a paid seat in a good college.
But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.

Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.

Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think
they should ban it.

Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

Candidate: No, no... I am talking about Exams!!

Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?

Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus
corporation in Maharashtra) through some relative.

Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?

Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!

Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?

Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)

Interviewer: And which languages have you used?

Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.

Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?

Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!

Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.
Interviewer: What is your general project experience?

Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of the times they are in pipeline!

Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?

Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.

Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?

Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM', 'quality', 'versioncontrol', 'deadlines' , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!

Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?

Candidate: Not much.
1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.
2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.
3. I believe in flexi-timings.
4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.
5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.
6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe. But considering the fact that there is Olympics
coming up in China in the current year, I don't mind going there in that period. As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?

Interviewer: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. Welcome to INFOSYS.

The fellow was appointed in a newly created section 'Stress Management' in the HRD of Infosys.


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An Extra Spoon.. in Recession

One fine Sunday, as usual I went outing with my frnz and we were supposed to take a lunch. So found a restaurant and made an order for the superb combination of Veg fried rice and raita. There; I was supposed to meet Mr.Pointer uncle, who always wants to point out the things which were behind the screen. I invited him to join with us for the lunch. [ The big mistake I did.] The food was served and everything gone fine along with his big lecture for our future. He made a fun of us and laughed at our helpless situation. Even he showed his pittiness for being jobless. We are punished to hear his lecture coz it's his time. When we were about to finish our lunch, I found him irritated for trying to take the last pinches of the food into the spoon. I took an extra spoon and gave him to make him easy. With the help of this extra spoon, he pushed the remaining into the spoon and felt comfortable. He smiled and thanked me for the thing. Then, I pointed out the reason for being unemployed.
                                         I told him that even though the food was delicious, he can't make it easy to take the last pinches of food into the spoon without the help of an extra spoon, same as what we were left helpless and were being jobless without the help of IT companies in this recession period. I also pointed out for being lucky to have an extra spoon at the time he needed, and for what we were not. Then he had no word for the remaining minutes until we left the restaurant for the day.

At times, we really need an extra spoon... an extra spirit that could help us to have an extra ordinary achievement.

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